Is God Calling Me?

Destinies are sometimes so; they would be incidental and surprising; some are heavy responsibilities, others the anointing to cry out the unpleasing. Some others would be the persuasion to carry His cross and help Him. Dear child, God’s call is so!

I do not know which of these the destiny is entrusted to you. But I know one thing; that, from now on your daily troubles would not be such as the old ones. You would never be watching the old ways, streets and familiar faces that you used to.

If God is calling You

If you are sure that He has called you… then, just keep your ears a bit closer to His heart and listen. Yet again if you could discern that voice, you are never to stay back. What awaits you is not a land of Canaan flowing milk and honey; not a paradise of wealth and pleasure. You may not have the castles of authority.

What you are to see; hearts bleeding, turbulent tides of lamentations unrest, skulls everywhere, crowds that condemn you; there may not be a sleepless mother waiting for you or a woman to embrace you on your journey back home.

When you are soaked under the rain and reach home, there may not be mother with a kerchief; no one to wait for you and share with you hot food. You are alone… Paying ears to the very many troubles and pains of the multitude, you would just be a cloud that is clotted in the air and unable to shrill rain. As you lift the bread in front of the thousands, you will be called to break yourself like it. Yes, my dear child, that is called vocation!

God’s call is so

Abraham – He first called an old man, a man who had to earn nothing at the end of life. He was one who couldn’t even give birth to a child at his fruitful years. He is called and asked to move to a land unseen and unheard of. He couldn’t resist His call nor deny it. Because his name was ‘Abram’; the one destined to be called.

Moses - Another man was called from the burning bush prepared literally like a ‘trap’. It was burning but not consumed. Moses was about to watch that great miracle from a little close circle and then he was called. (Exodus 3). God called him. From that day onwards his life was different; a journey for forty years leading an ungrateful people. He was tempted to stay back many a time. But he was unable to come to blows with the one who called him.

David – We see such call yet again in the first book of Samuel. A poor cattle boy, he was not even counted as worth in his family, the eighth son of Jesse. The greatest prophet of Israel is in search of him with a jar of anointing oil. That day David’s boyhood was over. The oil that poured out from the jar of Samuel, took away the little peace that he enjoyed in his life. My dear child, the ways that he ran through… tears filled nights… worries that he had to suffer. Yes, anointing has a price to be paid; a non payable price. Those are the psalms flowing from the heart which spreads through the 150 chapters.

Samuel – Look at the life of boy Samuel. There was a man called Elkanah in the hilly areas of Ephraim. His wife Hannah. She was barren. But she pleaded with the Lord and earned Samuel; a woman who made a covenant with the Lord. Hannah had promised God to offer her offspring to the Lord, if she is blessed with a child. She kept her promise. As he finished breastfeeding, she offered him to the Lord. A boy in the Temple… let us call him ‘offering.’

His Lord and owner was God Himself. Eli the priest was his guardian. In a cold night in the temple, God called him by name. Not one time, but three times. For the first two times he thought that it was Eli calling. Samuel approached him and asked for the purpose. ‘Did you call me?’ But Eli corrected him. He knew it was God calling Samuel. The call was clear for the third time. ‘Samuel, Samuel…” He responded, “Speak Lord, your servant listens.” Yes, it is called vocation.

Mary – Much more accidental was the call of Mary the young girl. Her father Joachim and mother Annah. Both of them died at her very young age. God is her owner. It is to this young girl that the messenger of the Lord, Gabriel, arrives. Mary was engaged; she never knew the man. That call might have stunned her. What gossips all around? What are the perils on the way…? Her life too was different from that day onwards. It was the call of a young girl called to be the Mother of God.

Mathew was a tax collector. He was called from his field. Peter’s call was not different. He left his boat and net aside and followed him. Another young man was hesitant and requested some time… and he was rebuked. Those who want to follow me must come in time by leaving everything. What an adamant invitation!

Saul – You might have heard of the call of Saul the young man. A man in the opposite team… He too was changed. Saul became Paul. He trusted in the one who called him… that too till death.

A question still awaits… Lord, tell me, what is my call?

“This is just useless as an old piece of paper. It could be thrown out as a worn out shoe. But you are calling me… I do not know for what… that is up to you. Here I am. A broken drum… tattered flowers… a tumbrel with raucous voice. Here I am Lord… you might use me as you wish…”

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- – - written by Santimon Jacob